It’s what you have defined yourself. A dominant personality, a dominant role, a dominant. Wikipedia defines a dominant as:
In human sexual behavior, a dominant is one who enjoys performing any of a variety of BDSM practices upon a submissive; or one who holds a dominant position within a relationship based upon dominance and submission (DS). This enjoyment can spring from a simple desire for dominance or an enjoyment of the interplay of wills involved in such a scenario. A male dominant is often called a dom; a female, a domme or dominatrix.
Each and every individual finds their place as unique and specific to their needs. When you think about who you are you can define attitudes, behaviors, characteristics that you see as dominant for you. Others may not agree. The fact remains that you have specified this place as yours. You are dominant.
We have all seen the pledges, the creeds, the inspiring bits of electronic babble about a successful dominant, a good dominant or a Master’s law. Most of them can be dismissed as mush that submissives gobble up in their desire to seek out their perfect Master. I have yet to find a decent essay that is worth placing here as a good definition of a dominant that isn’t partial to niceties, fanciful dreaming or submissive ideals. (If you know where one is or have one, I’d love to see it.)
There are also discussions about types of dominants being better than others or more compatible to different submissive types. The good guys, the cruel sadists, the sensualists, the daddies, just to name a few. Compatibility is a blending of two separate souls; is it impossible to wager that one d-type may be compatible with a completely different s-type?
The thoughts today are thus:
- How do you define ‘dominant’?
- What characteristics do you see in yourself that tell you that your definition fits you?
- What type of dominant are you?
- How do you assert your dominance within your relationship?
- Is your dominance natural or have you had to develop it over time?
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