Often in BDSM-speak, it is said submission is a gift. What does this mean to you?  What about dominance–can this be a gift too?

What does the term ‘brat’ mean to you?

How do you feel about having your submissive not look you in the eye? Do you prefer the lowered gaze in submission? When would it be appropriate for the submissive to look upon you then.

If you feel that lowered gaze isn’t your preference, why? What is the benefit of seeing into thier eyes?

Who “teaches”? Take for example the submissive is more experienced than the dominant. Can the sub teach from the bottom?  Should the Dom look to other Doms? Perhaps finding a mentor or start at the bottom?

• When are you not in role? What defines you?
• What do you think about submissives that switch roles and become dominants? (different than switches)
• Do you have another personae on the internet than you do in real life? Do you practice online D/s with this personae?

ls there a point where you feel that behavior modification or changing a slave goes too far?

• Top 10 things I really enjoy doing in a scene as a top.
• Top 10 things you worry about going wrong during a scene.
• Top 10 things you want your bottom to do during a scene.
• Top 10 things play things you want to master for scenes.

Sharing your favorites may seem like childish games, but it could help you focus on what you’d like to offer in a D/s or M/s relationship. Try to answer these as honestly as possible.

Favorite:

• sexual position
• bondage style (metal, rope, leather, etc)
• impact toys
• psychological play activity
• non-sexual play
• manners in a submissive
• physical attributes
• training methods
• sexual orientation
• domestic skills
• special services
• fetishes
• outfits on a submissive
• rules to enforce
• beverage service
• sexual service
• behavior in public

BDSM Quickies are not about sex. They are about play (which I understand, for some of you IS sex). To discern the two, let’s agree that BDSM does not have to involve sexual penetration. This can be from a quick spanking, to a forced humiliation scene lasting less than 15 mins, or in fact any short scene that enhances your life that takes very little time to do.

• What are your favorite BDSM quickies?
• Do they satisfy you, or just stir your lust for more?
• What role do quickies play in your D/s relationship?
• If you don’t engage in BDSM quickies, why not?

• All of us want to get something out of a scene and most of us want to get something good out of a scene. What happens when things don’t go quite the way you expected? How do you confront and sort through anything from a major catastrophe (serious injury, law enforcement, etc.) to the minor replaying of the scene and how you would have done things differently? What happens when one or the other breaks out of their head space and can’t go on? How do you deal with ensuing crash of the other partner?
• What is the purpose of play/scene for you?  What do you hope to get out to of the experience?
• What is the best advice you ever received, and does it apply to your dominance? What is the best advice you could offer to someone seeking to learn about dominance?